Its has been 4 years since i start work after graduating from polytechnic. Ever since i graduate i knew i had to work hard to help solve family debts.
Giving up almost all my salary and wishes. Trying hard to solve the debts but till now nothing had been done successfully. Why??
After working for half a year.. i decide to pursue my degree.. However i wasn't able to complete my degree.. this is one my regrets.. Till now i wish to pursue my degree and wear the graduation gown however i am not sure if i am able to.
I has been trying hard to balance my life and clearing of debts. But it seems never ending to me. I am still unable to see the end to it. Prehaps i will really only be able to enjoy and have happy and better life after marriage. But marriage to me now is out of the topics. Without any saving, marriage to me is no way..
Expected to settle and start saving this year but was not able to till now. And fear that more debts will be coming my way really made me go berserk. Trying hard to control my feelings and emotion infront of everyone. It is really terrible...Is there any way that i can have a huge amount infront of me to clear my debts one and for all?
I am really feeling vexed, fedup and numb in my heart... Who can help me?
Monday, August 4, 2008
Monday, June 2, 2008
Mixed Feelings
It has been months since we last seen each other. After what had happened, we seem completely stranger.
Is this part of my life experience. Within few months i suffer heart pain and unknowingly injury. I also do not understand why that would happen to me.
I am a person whom sometime do not really understand myself. Was it because it had been years since i received pampering from someone that's what had caused what happened to me months ago.
Today my dear friend told me an unexpected news. 'A' has resigned. Where is he going? Why would i wish to know?
Because I still miss him?
Because I am curious?
Because he is afterall my friend?
Because I am kpo?
I do not deny i still miss him but is miss as a friend. I would wish to know after our sudden start and separation what happened to him and if he is really very happy.
I believe if it was another guy i would also wish to know where he is going to...
Last year when i asked him why he never change job. He mentioned he do not know what to change to and lazy to go find. However in a sudden he changed. He has been in current company for more than 6 years. Ever since before i started my poly school life.
Anyway i could only wish him all the best and may his future be colourful. Hope that he would know what he want and what people said of him would not happen in his new company. Hope that he really can find his way out of the forest...
All the Best....
Is this part of my life experience. Within few months i suffer heart pain and unknowingly injury. I also do not understand why that would happen to me.
I am a person whom sometime do not really understand myself. Was it because it had been years since i received pampering from someone that's what had caused what happened to me months ago.
Today my dear friend told me an unexpected news. 'A' has resigned. Where is he going? Why would i wish to know?
Because I still miss him?
Because I am curious?
Because he is afterall my friend?
Because I am kpo?
I do not deny i still miss him but is miss as a friend. I would wish to know after our sudden start and separation what happened to him and if he is really very happy.
I believe if it was another guy i would also wish to know where he is going to...
Last year when i asked him why he never change job. He mentioned he do not know what to change to and lazy to go find. However in a sudden he changed. He has been in current company for more than 6 years. Ever since before i started my poly school life.
Anyway i could only wish him all the best and may his future be colourful. Hope that he would know what he want and what people said of him would not happen in his new company. Hope that he really can find his way out of the forest...
All the Best....
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Office
It has been 6 mths plus since i joined the new company.
This month i received 2 news of resignation. My senior and one of my fellow colleague.
Together there is a total of 3 persons who resigned within half a year and 1 transferred to another department.
With the 2 resignation, i started to think if i will be able to stay long. With a poor or rather bad management leader but a understanding head that will try to give chance to my future development and career. What should i do? I do not know also.
My career future is a road which i could not see currently.
What should i do?
This month i received 2 news of resignation. My senior and one of my fellow colleague.
Together there is a total of 3 persons who resigned within half a year and 1 transferred to another department.
With the 2 resignation, i started to think if i will be able to stay long. With a poor or rather bad management leader but a understanding head that will try to give chance to my future development and career. What should i do? I do not know also.
My career future is a road which i could not see currently.
What should i do?
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Poor Management?
In every company, management is very important. Without a good management, a company is unable to work well.
Having a good and understanding boss is important. What should a good boss/supervisor process?
1) Be understanding
2) Listening and Accept suggestion from fellow colleague
3) Show care and concern to fellow colleague
4) Treat colleague as friend at certain times
5) Try to stand in their position to look at things
What other things contribute to good and well management?
After working for 6 months in my current jobs, my senior is resigning to retire. Is it really early retirement? It was a sudden news for all of us.
Was it because of management that caused part of her decision to resign and rest?
Prior to my joining of this company, people told me that since new management takeover. There was people requesting for transferring out of the department and leaving the company. News ablout her management is known to most people even not within the company. However, i still decided to joined the new company and give it a try.
As i think about it, i was wondering if i was able to stay in this company for long term? My future seem blur and unknown to me. What should i do?
Should i stay?
Should i look for a better or new career in a new industry?
Having a good and understanding boss is important. What should a good boss/supervisor process?
1) Be understanding
2) Listening and Accept suggestion from fellow colleague
3) Show care and concern to fellow colleague
4) Treat colleague as friend at certain times
5) Try to stand in their position to look at things
What other things contribute to good and well management?
After working for 6 months in my current jobs, my senior is resigning to retire. Is it really early retirement? It was a sudden news for all of us.
Was it because of management that caused part of her decision to resign and rest?
Prior to my joining of this company, people told me that since new management takeover. There was people requesting for transferring out of the department and leaving the company. News ablout her management is known to most people even not within the company. However, i still decided to joined the new company and give it a try.
As i think about it, i was wondering if i was able to stay in this company for long term? My future seem blur and unknown to me. What should i do?
Should i stay?
Should i look for a better or new career in a new industry?
Saturday, March 22, 2008
** Tired... Struggling..Vex **
Hai~... What is life?
Life is suffering? Life is happiness?
For years i had been struggling to pay debts and pay debts. I am trying ways to look at the bright side, hoping miracle will appear one day. But till now nothing had happened. Only more and more tons of debt to carry on my shoulder.
Sometimes i just wish to run away to a far away land and live alone.
Every month my salary is not even enough to cover the debts. When will i be able to strike a big 4D or toto and clear my debts one and for all..
This month i am in a headache again. Gotta to clear a 1k cheque and contribute to my cousin wedding ang bao. Where can i find so much money?
Sometime i wish my the other part is able to help me clear and contribute to my debts but it was not easy to really ask for money just like this. I wish to share my problem with him but i can't do it. Why? Cause i scare he will feel i am a burden.
Why is my life in such a dilemma?
Life is suffering? Life is happiness?
For years i had been struggling to pay debts and pay debts. I am trying ways to look at the bright side, hoping miracle will appear one day. But till now nothing had happened. Only more and more tons of debt to carry on my shoulder.
Sometimes i just wish to run away to a far away land and live alone.
Every month my salary is not even enough to cover the debts. When will i be able to strike a big 4D or toto and clear my debts one and for all..
This month i am in a headache again. Gotta to clear a 1k cheque and contribute to my cousin wedding ang bao. Where can i find so much money?
Sometime i wish my the other part is able to help me clear and contribute to my debts but it was not easy to really ask for money just like this. I wish to share my problem with him but i can't do it. Why? Cause i scare he will feel i am a burden.
Why is my life in such a dilemma?
Monday, February 18, 2008
Never Regret
Human is a strange creature. When things have not happen you would not realise the importance of it. When it happen, you will start to think why i did that why i did not do it...
As such, i had told myself to do what i want and thought of.
After what happened to Xinyan, i realise that things really happen unexpectedly. Who would had expect that she will leave us in such a sudden and young age. Leaving behind her loved one, family and friends.
At time i ask myself what will i had become if i was to be in her stage.
Seeing love ones leave you, will really make your heart devasted.
So remember never do things you will regret. If you have anything you wish to do or say, do it. Do not have any regrets. Life is unexpected, no one will know what will happen the next moments.
As such, i had told myself to do what i want and thought of.
After what happened to Xinyan, i realise that things really happen unexpectedly. Who would had expect that she will leave us in such a sudden and young age. Leaving behind her loved one, family and friends.
At time i ask myself what will i had become if i was to be in her stage.
Seeing love ones leave you, will really make your heart devasted.
So remember never do things you will regret. If you have anything you wish to do or say, do it. Do not have any regrets. Life is unexpected, no one will know what will happen the next moments.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
A Big Unexpected Surprise
Another months has passed. He treated me very good and sweet. Today he prepared cable car dinner for me and also a surprise gift.
Guess what the surprise gift is. I would never expected that he would get me such a big and expensive gift so fast and so soon. When i saw the box i was stunned.
He got me a diamond ring which was 0.19 big in total. When i saw the receipt i was shocked. It cost $900. It was something that i would not bear to spend. Even for himself, he would feel heart pain to spend this amount. Yet he spent it on me. It truly touched my heart and make me feel lost.
It was the first diamond ring in my life that i had. It was also the most expensive jewellery i had in my life. Or should i say the most expensive thing that i had.
I felt high in the sky. Pampered under his care and love.
Thanks a lot my Dear for all the LOVE and CARE you had given me.
Guess what the surprise gift is. I would never expected that he would get me such a big and expensive gift so fast and so soon. When i saw the box i was stunned.
He got me a diamond ring which was 0.19 big in total. When i saw the receipt i was shocked. It cost $900. It was something that i would not bear to spend. Even for himself, he would feel heart pain to spend this amount. Yet he spent it on me. It truly touched my heart and make me feel lost.
It was the first diamond ring in my life that i had. It was also the most expensive jewellery i had in my life. Or should i say the most expensive thing that i had.
I felt high in the sky. Pampered under his care and love.
Thanks a lot my Dear for all the LOVE and CARE you had given me.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
2008
Times fly.. A New Year has started. With the start of the year, it seems that lots of thing happened in the past year 2007.
A recap of all the happenings, it seems like a dream. Since mid of 2007 till end of 2007, everything happened in such a strange and unexpected pattern. Sadness seems more than happiness ...
Things seem to change like wind that fast. In within 3 months, i encountered 3 heartbreak. As i drifted in the sea for 2 months, only than did i start to realise there is sweetness around me and it appeared 6 years ago. But till only 2 months ago than we realise each other.
As i recall things that happened, i felt silly. L incident made me feel the most pain and shocking. I would never expect myself to be in the boat and suffering.
With the new love and sweetness from Jimmy. Life has changed and i sink in the boat of LOVE. I would thanks no one but Jimmy my dearest Dear for all his Love and Care.
As the new year start, my dear sister Lin also started a new life. On the xmas day she meet the guy and in less than a week she sink into the Love boat. Although most of us feel strange and surprised but we would wish her all the best. I do not know the guy well however i would only hope he is true to her and treat her well. All the best my Dear Sister... Takecare and Wish you all the best in your Love Life....
A recap of all the happenings, it seems like a dream. Since mid of 2007 till end of 2007, everything happened in such a strange and unexpected pattern. Sadness seems more than happiness ...
Things seem to change like wind that fast. In within 3 months, i encountered 3 heartbreak. As i drifted in the sea for 2 months, only than did i start to realise there is sweetness around me and it appeared 6 years ago. But till only 2 months ago than we realise each other.
As i recall things that happened, i felt silly. L incident made me feel the most pain and shocking. I would never expect myself to be in the boat and suffering.
With the new love and sweetness from Jimmy. Life has changed and i sink in the boat of LOVE. I would thanks no one but Jimmy my dearest Dear for all his Love and Care.
As the new year start, my dear sister Lin also started a new life. On the xmas day she meet the guy and in less than a week she sink into the Love boat. Although most of us feel strange and surprised but we would wish her all the best. I do not know the guy well however i would only hope he is true to her and treat her well. All the best my Dear Sister... Takecare and Wish you all the best in your Love Life....
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